In 2013 YCombinator, the world's largest startup accelerator, selected my startup to have an interview. After hundreds of hours of preparation, there we were in a room with true titans of Silicon Valley: Paul Buchheit (creator of Gmail), Geoff Ralston (Yahoo! Mail), Michael Seibel (Twitch), and Kevin Hale (Wufoo). It was only 15 minutes. 15 minutes where you put it all on the line with the most far-fetched and tough questions. And we failed. We got rejected, but it wasn't the end.

Failure is normal. As bigger the challenge is, the more atypical the success. We always hear that we learn from our mistakes and that we will do better next time. We often believe that we will never get a second chance because it is not part of the script, but that is not true. Most of the time we just have to ask for a second chance by being humble and making a good argument. And that's what we did.

The night we were rejected, I wrote an email of 950 words (this post has 530) where I clearly and forcefully attacked their fears and doubts, always with a lot of respect. They gave us a second chance the next day. We were able to have another interview and demonstrate again the value of our project. We were not accepted, but we left there with the total certainty that we had done everything in our power. We really did.

Don't wait for a second opportunity. Create it!

With this post I wanted to share with you some tips that has worked for me countless times to get second chances, the vast majority with a happy ending. It doesn't matter if you ask for a second chance by email or in a face-to-face conversation.

• Appreciate the time our interlocutors are investing in the process.
• Accept their decision. This is not a debate, the decision was made correctly with all the information that was available. They have not made a mistake because we have not been able to share all the evidence and information of value with them.
• Use a maximum of 3 high-value reasons. Try to find the most memorable. You can also choose those that were unclear or generated insecurities for your interlocutor.
• Always provide data and evidence, not beliefs, assumptions, or phrases that do not help to quantify. It is always better to use numbers and percentages (even if they are approximate) than words like "almost always", "many", etc.
• Be humble but confident. This should not become an inspirational and grandiloquent speech or a vendetta. It is a tool that helps to resolve ignorance, prejudices, fears, or misunderstandings.
• Be grateful for the opportunity to have a conversation even if the result is not the expected.
• Never push too hard. Making the other person feel uncomfortable may awaken the feeling of running away and want to cut ties with you as soon as possible.
• But the most important, ask for that second opportunity.

If this worked with the most demanding business accelerator in the world, I am sure it will also work for you in thousands of other situations.

There are words that have great power. They can destroy kingdoms or achieve accomplishments beyond imagination. One such word is "No". Simple, elegant, straightforward. Demolishing, thunderous, unequivocal. Just "No".

Why say "No"? Because of you. Life becomes so complex that at some point you stop managing your time and start managing your energy. Your happiness and freedom depend on it. And you can only protect them by focusing on your priorities, putting the focus only on what is worthwhile. This is achieved by saying "No".

People struggle to say "No". The fact of refusing something immediately makes us believe that our interlocutor will refuse us, that he will no longer count on us, that we have let him down. Guilt is the result of something that we have not even accepted. What a paradox, isn't it?

But did you know that by saying No you are not disappointing? By saying "No" you make expectations clear, you protect the future of both of you. And yet, a "Yes" opens the door to failure, to resentment against oneself for having assumed something you did not want.

Sometimes saying "No" is the kindest word, despite the box of thunder it can open. There is no need to give explanations, you are free in your "No", but it is convenient to be assertive and briefly make our decision known. And in the face of insistence, there is a lethal weapon: a definitive "No". We must be clear that we will not change our mind.

In our day to day we will face dozens of situations in which we will have to give an answer. "No" will not always be the obvious answer. Take your time, something reasonable. And if after that time the answer is still not clear, the answer is "No". The world is full of great unhappy people who said "Yes" because they were not clear about what they wanted, because they did not want to disappoint.

A dishonest "Yes" for others is a "No" for ourselves. A strong "No" makes you free, a weak "Yes" enslaves you. Only say "Yes" if you are absolutely sure. And if not, choose to be free, choose the "No".

Do you want to be your own boss? Or achieve the desired economic freedom? Or perhaps change the world? These are totally respectable attitudes, but they define a narcissist much better than an entrepreneur.

An entrepreneur is someone in love with a problem to solve. Maybe they are an expert in the field and knows how to attack it. Perhaps they don't have the knowledge, but they do have the resources. Or simply that passion for the problem drives them to solve it at any cost. Whatever the case may be, there is always an implicit passion to solve a problem.

The entrepreneur can never lose sight of what he or she wants to solve. Many fall along the way in love with their solution, putting the way over the goal. Falling in love with the solution, however elegant it may be, is a bad idea. The solution will have to adapt or even change abruptly because reality is often not what is in our heads. Believe me, ideas always pivot, solutions always change. And whoever is not able to see it falls into a self-destructive hedonism.

Find a problem that is really worth solving and go for it. It is the noblest and unique way to start on the path of entrepreneurship.