Say No

Say No
Photo by Mehdi Sepehri / Unsplash

There are words that have great power. They can destroy kingdoms or achieve accomplishments beyond imagination. One such word is "No". Simple, elegant, straightforward. Demolishing, thunderous, unequivocal. Just "No".

Why say "No"? Because of you. Life becomes so complex that at some point you stop managing your time and start managing your energy. Your happiness and freedom depend on it. And you can only protect them by focusing on your priorities, putting the focus only on what is worthwhile. This is achieved by saying "No".

People struggle to say "No". The fact of refusing something immediately makes us believe that our interlocutor will refuse us, that he will no longer count on us, that we have let him down. Guilt is the result of something that we have not even accepted. What a paradox, isn't it?

But did you know that by saying No you are not disappointing? By saying "No" you make expectations clear, you protect the future of both of you. And yet, a "Yes" opens the door to failure, to resentment against oneself for having assumed something you did not want.

Sometimes saying "No" is the kindest word, despite the box of thunder it can open. There is no need to give explanations, you are free in your "No", but it is convenient to be assertive and briefly make our decision known. And in the face of insistence, there is a lethal weapon: a definitive "No". We must be clear that we will not change our mind.

In our day to day we will face dozens of situations in which we will have to give an answer. "No" will not always be the obvious answer. Take your time, something reasonable. And if after that time the answer is still not clear, the answer is "No". The world is full of great unhappy people who said "Yes" because they were not clear about what they wanted, because they did not want to disappoint.

A dishonest "Yes" for others is a "No" for ourselves. A strong "No" makes you free, a weak "Yes" enslaves you. Only say "Yes" if you are absolutely sure. And if not, choose to be free, choose the "No".